How do I know that you are a true friend? How do I know that you won't be one of the many others who use me up until I am dry & then spit me out? How do I know that I am not going to be a fly by the night friend?
I want true friends in my life, friends that love me as I am, accept me for who I am, and are not embarrassed by me in any way. I desire to be my true self and I do not want to be a chameleon just to keep you by my side. I want to know that if I need you, even though it may be three in the morning, that there will be a voice on the other end to listen to my randomness, ramblings, non-sense, sobs, pain, anger, frustration, whatever it is. I want to know that when you say you are going to do something you do it. Don't leave me hanging…I want consistency…I know you have a life; I know you have other friends, but just reassure me that you are a true friend and not a fraud. I don't expect to talk everyday or to see you once a week, but hell if you are on facebook with me you can at least leave me a little message or even comment on one of my random posts.
I understand I come with a lot of baggage, but I am doing my best to deal with my shit, so please bear with me as I work through my pain, my anguish, my frustrations, my chaos, my dysfunction, my life. I am working towards and taking steps towards a better future, but it is painstakingly slow because there is so much to uncover, so many corners and cracks that need light so what is buried there can be uncovered. However, if you are a true friend then you will allow me the time to deal and work on this, you will also stand by my side and love me even through the pain.
Rest assured that if you show me that you are a true friend, you will have my loyalty and I will do all the things for you that I desire and long for in a friend.
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